91 | 你心里最后一个 The Last One in Your Heart

眼著溶解的云,缓慢地开绽,碎裂的时间,滑著伞沿打下。
战争歇在心里,祈祷披盖一场绵­绵。
寂寞都雾了。

空荡荡的舞台上,孤单单的指挥家,在你面前演一场,我曾怀疑是幻象。
药水请萧邦地擦,­谎言请李白地讲,在你手里睡一下,带着暖心的伤,结痂。

耳著凝结的雨,倒带地升华,共鸣的时间,枕着故事而上。
场景醒在睡里,预言冲刷一片朗­朗,温柔都亮了。

红通通的月亮下,暖烘烘的燕尾床,在你面前扯了嗓,我也脱掉了害怕。
快乐请烟火地嚷,­忧伤请汪洋地放,在你心里睡一下,生著微笑的花,带伤。

沉甸甸的宁静上,轻飘飘的精灵光,赶走失眠里的羊,不需为幻象害怕。
声线就青鸟地唱,­脚步就落叶地踏,在你笑里睡一下,结著守护的痂,生花。

躺在海的眠床上……你在眼前……

//

Eyeing the melting clouds as they slowly disperse
Shattered time drips off my umbrella
The war rests in my heart, prayers take shelter under thick cotton
Loneliness grows foggy in the distance

On a despairingly empty stage, a lonesome conductor stands
Performs in front of you, I once thought it to be an illusion
Medicate your wounds like Chopin, tell lies like Li Bai,
I’ll have a nap in the palm of your hand, nurse a heartwarming wound, form scabs from it

Listening to crystallizing rain, sublimating in rewind
The resonance of time bolstered by narrative
The scenery is awake in sleep, soothsayings wash everything in a tint of rose as even warmth lights up.

Under the flushing red moon, a toasty dovetailed bed
My voice strains in front of you, I’ve shrugged off fear
Cheer cheer like fireworks, despair despair like oceans,
I’ll have a nap in your heart, sprout smiling flowers that are tinged with hurt

Under the deadweight of silence, the lightness of a sprite,
Chase away the sheep of insomnia, you have nothing to fear from the illusions
Sing like a songbird, step like a falling leaf,
I’ll have a siesta in your smile, spring scabs of guardianship,
sprout flowers.

Lying down on the soft bed of the sea, you are before me.

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90 | 空氣中的視聽與幻覺

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終於讓我等到了蘇打綠 - 一大早就收到短訊,朋友們都興奮的不了呢!

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今年的循環演唱會在室內體育館舉行。真的不是說特別high,也沒必要嘛。我並不否認我有點莫名其妙感到很緊張,有使勁裝副冷靜的樣。蘇打綠的音樂從一開始就是療傷的,也對社會現象提出觀察,所以對我來說價值特別高 - 就像天氣冷的時候帶給我無限溫暖的一杯熱咖啡,炎熱的夏天後涼爽的秋天。無論是失落,受傷,滿足,心寒,什麼時候都愛聽蘇打綠。情感價值很高啦,能讓我把出道以來的歌曲全部背熟的就僅有蘇打綠。

 

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看完蘇打綠的演唱會並沒有什麼激烈的情感,那三個鐘頭內沈浸在溫暖的歌聲與情感之中就已經足夠了。能夠現場用心靈聆聽蘇打綠真的是件特別幸福的事。蘇打綠從頭到尾都不能成為偶像,是真正的歌者,音樂人,創作才子。

蘇打綠的十週年,我開始喜歡蘇打綠。我預計到了20,30週年,我還會坐在舞台前用心聆聽這個樂團吧。

接下來的十年,二十年,我們用溫暖推翻這世界。

82 | Winter in SG

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If you’ve never set eyes on someone else who was as happy to be standing in the sweltering Singapore sun, it’s because they didn’t spend 6 hours in a freezing Kbox. Seriously though, if you ever want to experience being frozen, try Kbox.

In the span of one week, I spent eight hours in Kbox, 2 hours with Cynthia at Bugis Ksuites and six with my family at Jurong SAFRA’s branch on Labour Day. And simply because I couldn’t find any information on this – if you are a Sodagreen fan and plan to go to Kbox, they have a large selection of Sodagreen! This includes recent releases from the 秋:故事 album and old goodies like 空气中的视听与幻觉,频率 and 迟到千年. So, grab a bunch of your friends (order honey lemon because singing in falsetto is no joke) and plow your way through the entire list of Sodagreen songs!

Now that that’s ticked off my bucket list, Sodagreen AIR 2014 I am coming!

73 | Buoy

It’s been a very long while, hasn’t it?

I’m usually quite punctual with my posts, at least once a week or in the busiest of periods, once a month. But I’ve not been here for close to 1.5 months! Mainly because I’m trying to find new direction, both for the blog and for my life. I’m actually trawling through the photo roll for the past month and a half right now and I can assure you that you didn’t miss much, really.

The following four pictures are going to be a quick recap of the past 1.5 months so.. keep up!

IMG_4184140214 Operation Valentines’ with Chapter + 02’s Valentine’s Day celebration

IMG_4295140220 Concluding the last of our presentations for Year 1 w/ ITB group

IMG_4556140307 Lunch before ASEAN Connect w/ Cynthia

IMG_4563140307 Dinner at 18Chefs w/ Cynthia, Russ & Weiyong

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That was a quick run through, but basically, I’ve completed Year 1!

If you ask me to summarize what it’s been like these 6 weeks in a word, it would, without doubt, be burdensome.

Very honestly, I have not been happy all this while. Ever since the Rebecca Minkoff card case incident it’s almost like I’ve been jinxed. I know I’ve always been happy doing juggling 101 things at a go but I think I’ve reached a point where I finally realize: I may be busy, not productive. What then is the point? I’m basically tiring myself out with things that mean a lot to me but I do not truly work for. Because of bad time management and perhaps even bad workload management, I’m going through the motions but not truly achieving anything. This left me sad, disoriented and increasingly fed up with myself. It’s a vicious cycle, you can see. I was truly beginning to lose steam all the way towards exams, like an airplane falling out of the sky (if I ever did cruise that high) and I felt dejected. When the holidays came, I basically lapsed into a slump. For once I felt really alone and vulnerable but at the same time it was exhilarating to not have to account to anyone for once.

My current status is still as per stated above ie. dejected, but there are definitely some things that have changed about me. I have become increasingly certain about specific things, such as the people who truly mean the world to me, people like my family, Jean, Liansheng, Buddy, etc. I guess it’s the toughest times that show you who will hang around you still.

Secondly, I’ve still been lurking around in the literary scene. Or should I say, lurking as an audience of the literary/arts scene. I’ve still been watching shows (as you’ll notice the Been There Done That page is still constantly being updated) and so far I’ve covered two very wonderful plays, a Yue opera piece called the Good Person of Szechwan, and coincidentally my translation lecturer sat beside me and explained a lot of what I didn’t know to me. Of course, I came out grinning like a bobcat, and when my parents come to pick me they have to endure an endless tirade of how marvellous the show was. This then repeated itself when I went to watch a Cantonese opera piece titled The Mad Phoenix. Clearly I have inherited Mummy’s penchant for opera shows! On the writing end, I really haven’t been writing as much, because I’m busy with life, but there have been moments when I felt like I would have an actual unsavoury physical reactions to words not being put on a page (like vomiting) so I had to pen them down.

Lastly, the one thing that kept me sane through this madness: sodagreen.
You may or may not have heard of this Chinese folk/rock/pop/indie band called 蘇打绿 Sodagreen but when I really felt like I was going to have a mental breakdown, it was their songs that sustained me through the day. It came to a point where I was just desperately looking forward to breaks just to have their music in my ears. Their songs are all either curative or invigorating in nature, with a range of toned-down songs like 独处的时候 When I’m Alone that heals you when you’re at your weakest (and ends with a message to look forward) to upbeat ones like 小宇宙 Little Universe which invigorates the self and encourages being considerate for society. For the first time I found myself thinking, Ah, this is what music should sound like. It doesn’t hurt that Sodagreen is very down-to-earth and lead singer QingFeng is especially witty and charming. I mean, this is the kind of character I could fall for. Their songs are not gender-specific, which is a feat in itself, and add that to the powerful lyrics (all self-written and self-composed) that touch on Chinese history, use a range of euphuistic Chinese phrases and words (some of which I didn’t even recognize, shame on me), are spot-on when it comes to hitting you in the heart with raw emotion and you have got, arguably, the most prolific band in Chinese history.

I guess from here, the rest of the holidays will be spent sorting my room (and my life) out, but this definitely won’t be the last post for March. I’ll be back, I’m not sure with what material though, possibly with beauty reviews – I’ve been deliberating for so long already – or even just non-beauty favourites.. I’m not sure yet! We’ll see.

Ending off with a list of dramas I’m chasing: Emergency Couple, Three Days & Ugly Alert! They (sort-of) fill in the gaps between theatre shows and whet my appetite for the big stage. 😉