36 | Patterns.

Credits: causeimdanjones@tumblr

Guys. This is Plutchik’s Wheel.

This was first introduced to me during an EQ lecture in SP, and I found it to be really helpful for self-awareness, so I’m posting my findings here 😉

The scale moves from fainter to darker, ie. pensiveness will increase in degree to reach sadness. As we go along, we follow certain patterns that aggravate the emotion, making it escalate in level, or we show certain characteristics/patterns of speech or action when we feel that emotion.

I decided to think of 3 from one selected segment (each segment is a different colour) and explain as part of today’s daily self-reflection!

I picked what I thought is the most important to be wary of – the anger side.

Generally I am positive and optimistic so being sad and pensive never lasts too long. It’s usually the time when I get to have many poetic thoughts and stuff that aids in my writing, or even nuggets of quotes, plays and such. I’m usually in a constant state of joy and ecstasy  I kind of tend to bypass the serenity portion. The rest are generally not emotions that are hard to discern I suppose. Anyway, back to anger.

STEP 1: Annoyance

– I say things like “Aiya..” or use a very exasperated tone of voice.
– I won’t make eye contact. I’m actually aware that my eyes betray my desire to leave the conversation.
– I change the topic really quickly.

EXTRA STEP: Frustration

– I cuss, I rhyme your names with them even.
– I make it a point to show you that I’m not happy with you whether you like it or not.
– I totally give up responding to you.

STEP 2: Anger

– I don’t cuss any more. I will burn and roast you with my words and reasoning instead.
– I use my death glare on you and if you don’t get the hint, I verbally shoot you and take a voluntary red card.
– I am just mean. Like, I shoot you mercilessly with words that are meant to cut.

STEP 3: Rage

So far, nobody has pushed me to this edge yet. Thank goodness.

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In conclusion, I don’t have a bad temper (my grandma) or a short temper (my mom) but I do have a quick temper. Much like a viper strike. You can say the same things to offend me millions of times but if you get me on the one day or the one time that I choose to react, you’re going to get bitten. Or it could be the first time you say something but if it triggers something in me, then it’s just your luck. Or possibly some kind of cosmic retribution. I don’t know.

I don’t usually lose my temper in school because I believe in segregating work and home. I keep my emotions at bay at school. It’s a common response for me to immediately choose to be more objective about certain issues (which means I don’t attack you as a person, I only shoot you for whatever you’ve done that’s triggered me) and not get too emotional. If I need time-off to cool off, I’ll take it. But outside of official business, I’m telling you, it’s a different ball game altogether. Though I generally don’t flare up in front of people because I don’t see the point in making others uncomfortable because of something you did, I will if you don’t take the hints.

In short, I choose not to be pissed off by most, but if you piss me off.. then congratulations, you’re going to witness a spectacular, sound scolding. 🙂

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