33 | My BFF Is Cuter Than Yours.

530022_10200426146590004_1645284210_n

Here is the story of a very simple day that made us both very happy.

At grumpy o’clock (which quantifies as anything before 1PM), the two of us took a train to Novena. Stopped at Yishun to meet Jean’s boyfriend and I got lovey vibes from them goodness.

Headed to Starbucks @ United Square and set up to camp the whole day there. Ordered a Venti Java Chip Frappe, my standard drink, with extra espresso. Because I knew I wouldn’t survive the day without the caffeine. Decaf is for the superhumans. Anyway, I chugged coffee and did mock TOPIK papers, revised grammar and wrote two 1000-word prose/monologue pieces which weren’t really exceptional. But really, the thing was that I managed to spend an entire day with this crazy girl and not actually go crazy and be productive.

Went off for 威南记 chicken rice somewhere near Novena and found out that the Korean BBQ that Lijie kor brought me to had closed down 😦 Anyway, had a very filling dinner thanks to Geric’s tendency to over-order. Jean was full halfway and made us choke down the rest to prevent food wastage! Hehe this is why she’s the queen 🙂 Cos we both pamper her too much!

Went back to Velocity for toilets and because Geric put our bags on Baskin’ Robbins property we got tempted to eat ice cream! Had two scoops of ice cream and felt more satisfied than ever before this girl’s camwhore instinct came back. So..

540153_10200426144949963_926058957_n
540162_10200426133549678_1857551222_n

547555_10200426132509652_930223909_n

You can probably tell that we are both very happy.

I think today boiled down to a realization of two things: one, it really doesn’t take a lot to make me happy, and two, writing may not be something I am exceptional at, but I still love it.

With reference to point one, just look at me above. I’m practically glowing with happiness. All I did was spend a day in the company of the girl and her comedian of a boyfriend. But she was happy, so I was happy. It’s almost like I feed off my best friends’ happiness, if they accomplish something, I’m happy. If they’re feeling loved, I’m happy. As long as they’re happy, I’m happy. I know I’m not the easiest person to love, I can be very difficult at times, but when you take time and effort to make that special connection with someone, everyone is worth reaching out for. 🙂 I’m glad she reached out for me!! We do all kinds of shit together, know each other’s garment sizes (ya, every garment) and know each other’s deepest secrets (she doesn’t have any). I love this girl, and I really cherish every moment we spend together!

As for point two, I realized today that writing is really not something I am extraordinary at. It took a few weeks at TYC to realize that I was practically soaking up knowledge every session and not contributing much, but I really love writing. It’s something I believe I will never give up on. When I learnt to appreciate the power of words, linguistics, and language, I knew that I would never turn back. My problem is, even though I may have the necessary linguistic sense, I lack creativity, and that is so crucial in creative writing (ditto). Yet I cannot turn to factual writing like journalism because I am too emotive. So here’s my dilemma. Either I find some way to harvest my creative juices or I just stick to where I am and write mediocre crap for the decades to come. And when it comes to theatre, in particular, I lack the dramatic essence to come up with a good story to tell and to play on stage. It’s not as difficult when someone gives me the idea and I tell his/her story. But it’s hard for inspiration to strike. I feel a little discouraged here and there but I’m not giving up. I’m just stubborn like that. 🙂 Even if I’m not good at it, I enjoy it, and theatre/literature in general will be something I will be passionate about for a long, long time.

17775_10200426131389624_1098347904_n

We gotta keep smiling this way. ♥

CONGRATS TO BFF, WILSON! :’)

He completed a 16 hour run, with a distance of 70km. I’m exceedingly proud of him!! :’)

—————————————————————–

“When I was sixteen or seventeen, I wanted to be a writer. I wanted to be a playwright. But everything I wrote, I thought, was weak. And I can remember falling asleep in tears because I had no talent the way I wanted to have.”
– Francis Ford Coppola

And this is the exact way I feel right now. But I won’t give up, because this is my passion. 说我傻了也好,疯了也罢。主观的,客观的,旁观的拦阻太多,好坏要自己承受。我就是这么执着。

也许你会说 我想是个还没莫透露的盲人 却已经选择了要朝这个方向 都不知道路是否好走 就已经执着的定下心 但人始终有梦 而梦是靠自己走出来的。我现在在为我最爱的一份事业奋斗 谁都别拦住我 请让我趁年轻无畏时试着做补梦人的感觉吧!

32 | Venus In Fur.

576815_10200386411596654_1165687875_n

Because Jean & I haven’t seen each other in a drastically long period of time, we bought tickets to see Venus in Fur on 23 Mar, Sat, and halfway through the week we decided that we needed to start a new project namely picking up a completely new art form called needle felting. Doesn’t that make you wonder what the hell we talk about together? Well, we had to get supplies and after minimal googling we realized that all we needed was in Chinatown, so we basically spent the entire day shuttling from Bras Basah -> Chinatown -> Clarke Quay. Now you know where my ez-link money went. And in case you don’t know what needle felting is, here’s a short clip of it as introduced by one of my favourite makeup artists, bubzbeauty.

As for what project it is – shhh. 🙂

71934_10200386408956588_1323229315_n

Tried to walk from Clarke Quay to DBS Arts Centre but I got lost again. Seriously, you’d think that having classes there every Saturday and having gone to more than 3 productions would have given me some sort of direction sense but no I still get lost every single time I try to go to a production. Anyway, this time we ended up across the road from the back of UE Square which is probably a few steps closer than I was the previous time. Hailed a cab and hightailed it to DBS Arts Centre because we were a sliver away from being late D: And this show has no intermission!

Venus in Fur was, least to say, very unconventional. It’s not often you get to see this level of exposure in theatre. It had a lot of layers and sublime messages so I’d say I enjoyed it marginally more than a few other plays I’ve watched, but not to the extent that I’d love it. SRT is still very much expat theatre and I do enjoy local pieces more occasionally.

524970_10200386406436525_1648100240_n

After the play, we were both crazy tired, so we just took a cab back to CCK and had supper. And what’s open at CCK with aircon at 10pm? That’s right, Mcdonalds.

576051_10200386410116617_1174656578_n

I must say I really love the honey chicken drumlets that they sell now. It is rather pricey but it’s just so good as a snack after Korean class or as a cheer-me-up supper treat.

Anyway, we ended up doing an online How Well Do You Know Your BFF quiz and the results shocked us both cos she was the better friend! Oh gosh oh gosh. But I realized we do know quite a lot of personal details about each other. Having said that, if anyone ever recovers old Facebook messages or texts of ours and broadcasts them to the world, we are both doomed. D:

30 | Sisterhood & Space.

WP_000193

So, you guys probably know I just came home from a 3-night stay in Kuantan, visiting relatives. Basically, my grandaunts & their children live in Kuantan, which is in Pahang, Malaysia, and visiting them is just something I don’t really get to do often. I came with two missions, one, to visit relatives, and two, to complete a travel writing assignment. I was going to write an exposition of Kuantan, but who knew that everything was going to tie in so nicely that I had so much more to write about?

Firstly, on sisterhood.

I first approached this topic by watching Sisters, a play by my mentor, Jean Tay, put up as part of Literally9 at the Arts House. Aside from the technical genius of it, the concept and the lessons I garnered were very close to heart. I think it really touched the core of sisterhood – maybe the way sisters interact and bond is truly different from that of the brothers? Other than that, I really loved the way puppetry made the play come to life, and the use of very simple props – 8 chairs decked in different cloths and made of different textures, ie a chair draped in white cloth was used in the scene of the wedding, and chairs were overturned to form “islands”. It was an eye-opener and these are the things you can do in theatre and not on screen. That, for me, is the whole charm of the theatre. Also, the way the actresses took on more than 5 characters between them, each with distinctly different voices, characters, habits and personalities, was spectacular. They had the accents, expressions, and movements down to a T, accurately transitioning between characters in the blink of an eye. All in all, it was very experimental, but in my eyes it was a success, and it really inspired me to get on with my writing!!! Moving on..

I met my grandaunts & the way they were still very much emotionally attached to my Grandma despite being separated by the Causeway is just really admirable. 🙂

WP_000194

WP_000195

As you can see, this is a true blue kampong and I still have many memories of how I used to come here when I was younger and become some mosquito buffet! Nevertheless, it’s cool to be running around in the same space that my mom used to run around in, and to see the family history and property being passed down, generation to generation.

WP_000187

That oven is a whopping 50 years old. And yes, it’s still operational. In fact, most of the things you see on the table are older than I am, even.

WP_000188

The pantry always holds the sweetest memories for me cos I loved tagging along to my Sixth Grandaunt as she baked and she’d introduce all these ingredients to me in a cute way. 🙂

WP_000189

The view from behind the metal grille.

WP_000190

My grandaunt used to sing me this Big Ben song which I’ve forgotten now, but this clock has a really ominous chime. Don’t like it, but it’s one of a kind.

.

.

.

Next, about space.

After reading Boom, by Jean Tay, and The Coffin Is Too Big For The Hole by Kuo Pao Kun, I’m starting to wonder if  one day when I die, I won’t be able to opt to be buried. I want my ashes scattered in the sea, by the way, but as I paid respects  to family that day, I wondered if one day I’d be cramped instead of having the kind of space as they do in Malaysia. Hmm. 

In conclusion though, after three nights, copious amount of bak kut teh, chicken rice and kinship, I must say, I really do love my family there as well, and my essay is definitely going to be a long one. Phew.

29 | Respect.

Credit: x

Was kinda afraid to even write this at first, but I have to get this off my back!!

Recently, a certain spate of events made me realize just how important respect is in a relationship – any relationship. 

I never really took note of ‘respect’. It was and still is being overused everywhere. Not necessarily misused, mind you, but just so overused that it takes the impact out of a word.

Until a friend showed me what respect was, and why it’s so important.

This might not be morally or politically correct, but sod off. This is my blog.

He never ever treated me like I was worse than he was. Even though he’s older, even though he probably has experienced more than I have, and gone through more than I have, he has never used that and dissed me in my face.

Instead, when I don’t understand something, or am trying to get through a rough spot, I can count on him to be there with comforting words. The best part is that, he uses his experience to guide me through it. I mean, that’s what friends are for, right? Not to pull each other down, but to build each other up. He hasn’t been in my life very long, and we don’t know each other super well, but the kindness and love he’s shown to me far supersedes some of the older friends. That just goes to show that it isn’t how much time you spent with each other, it’s about how much effort you spend in building that connection.

With him I almost never really feel like I am inferior, or superior to him. It’s exchanges of knowledge, not showing who is better off, or worse off. He is just who he is, and I am who I am, and I know that he respects me. 🙂 As an added bonus, I think he’s one of the friends whom I connect on on many levels, not just because of common topics, but also because we both are constantly looking at ways to improve and encourage each other to do just that. Our friendship has become somewhat of sacred grounds – no judgment and no tearing down of each other. It’s just a safe zone where I can grow, learn and mature. And it’s so rare, and precious! I’m glad to have found a friend like him. Super, super glad. :’)

And it’s exactly because of him that I’m very aware now of how important respect is, and because of him, my attitude towards people has changed.

.

.

.

So, to that special friend. No matter what happens in the future, you know that you have left your legacy and shaped my life, made me a better person. Thank you. ♥

28 | The More Loving One.

Credit: tumblr

Image: x

The More Loving One
W. H. Auden

Looking up at the stars, I know quite well
That, for all they care, I can go to hell,
But on earth indifference is the least
We have to dread from man or beast.
How should we like it were stars to burn
With a passion for us we could not return?
If equal affection cannot be,
Let the more loving one be me.

Admirer as I think I am
Of stars that do not give a damn,
I cannot, now I see them, say
I missed one terribly all day.

Were all stars to disappear or die,
I should learn to look at an empty sky
And feel its total dark sublime,
Though this might take me a little time.

27 | Hype.

69693_10200314410250500_2011125887_n

Set off for Singapore Repertory Theatre (SRT) at grumpy o’clock this morning for The Young Co.’s weekly meeting. If I started off excited about the class, it’s now blossomed into slight emotional attachment – and we’re only on our fifth week. It’s just nothing short of amazing to have  a class of fellow playwrights to workshop plays with. These are really, really talented people with impressive works and portfolios and I’m very grateful to be a part of this circle! Been absorbing knowledge over the past few weeks and writing. The only issue is that I tend to write snippets nowadays and not full-length anythings. I got stuck with the set design on one, the storyline on another. Got me very frustrated, but at least I managed to churn new words out! 12233_10200314943583833_1178904558_n

Rushed home after some errands and got ready for a night out with my folks. Took Mom & Dad to the Grand Cathay to watch a special screening of Ah Boys To Men marathon. Turns out the cast was sitting exactly 2 rows above me! All three of us entirely enjoyed the movie – maybe it’s because some form of army heritage was a common denominator, and perhaps also because I inherently inherited a passion for the nation & armed forces in my childhood years. The jokes were just as funny, touching scenes just as moving. The response to ABTM was probably unexpected, but come to think of it, the entire shared experience really can bond men across generations, races, religions, and probably most other distinctions as well. Also helped that the script was peppered with jokes that were actually funny. One thing I don’t understand though, is the star appeal of the cast. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I don’t recall having the same frenzy over I Not Stupid or Money No Enough. Having said that, it was a wise decision – and has certainly proved so – for Jack Neo to cast young up-and-coming Youtubers, actors and recognizable youth in this movie. I mean, just look at Tosh & Noah. They easily have the biggest fanclubs among the cast and it’s probably partially due to their Youtube productions as well. As for me, I’ll keep straddling the borders of the Tosh/Weiliang fanclubs!

.

.

.

It’s not been an easy or particularly fruitful week, but as always, you gain some and lose some. 🙂 Here’s to a super-productive week! Cheers.